10 things not to say after sex

Washington, Feb 1 (ANI): There are few things you should avoid saying to your partner after making love, if you don't want your relationship to end up in disaster.

There's enough sex in D.H. Lawrence's scandalous masterwork Lady Chatterley's Lover, but one can also find ten things said after sex that you really wouldn't want to say today, according to the Huffington Post.

Some are said by men, some are said by women, but both sexes should avoid pretty much all of them.

The 10 things in the order in which they appear in the book, according to the paper, are as follows:

Don't complain about the timing of someone's orgasm (or how they got there)-

Never to talk about the woman's orgasm right after she's had it, much less criticize how she gets herself there. Even if you want to praise her (or yourself ) for the success you just had, better keep still. Let it happen; don't shine light on it lest it disappear.

Never ask if your lover regrets the sex you just had

Asking if someone regrets the recently concluded festivities might sound nice on paper, but if the person is feeling sorry or uncomfortable after sex, she probably doesn't want to talk about it.

Discussing your socioeconomic differences isn't sexy-or practical

The more you mention the money discrepancy, the more power you give him to hold it against you.

Do not allude, however vaguely, to your past lovers or experience

No matter what observation you want to make about sex, keep everyone else out of it-no referring to your experience or your knowledge in general. Save such observations for less vulnerable moments.

Do not mention love to your no-strings-attached lover

If you think you're never going to fall in love with him, guess what: That's probably exactly what he'd prefer. No need to feel guilty or to say anything at all.

Post-coitus, don't ever ask if he or she loves you

This one is probably the worst all around; if you find it coming to your lips, you'd better keep quiet and start looking for real signs of love, not just hollow, forced assurances.

Never, under any circumstances, use the "c" word

Though Lady Chatterley's Lover was written in the 1920s, the c-word already had a dodgy reputation (despite a variant of it being used in the Middle Ages by Chaucer). These days, that would be an utter disaster to say, but even then it wasn't great.

Tread with caution when talking about his penis

"Tiny," for the record, is never a word a guy wants to hear about his John Thomas.

Do not raise the issue of cohabitation out of the blue

While this might be a lovely sentiment to say in a real love relationship that had developed adequately, it's not the kind of idea you want to raise for the first time post-flagrante. And doing it with someone who isn't ready for cohabitation can only lead to disaster.

Watch what you say about your lover's body

Men, if you're complimenting a woman's ass (or pretty much anything else), make sure you don't call her womanly, don't comment on its size, and don't under any circumstances contrast her-even favorably-to skinny girls.

You might be trying to say that she looks like a Playboy centerfold; she's more likely to hear that she could never be in Vogue. (ANI)


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