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Things Cricket Commentators Say [And What They Mean]

'He’s no mug with the bat.'

Venkatpathy Raju: No mug with the bat, not. Venkatpathy Raju: No mug with the bat, not.

Venkatpathy Raju: Definitely a mug with the bat.

Used for: Just about every No. 8 batsman in history.

What it means: I’m just being polite. He has little chance of scoring runs today.

'He's a gritty customer'

Used for: Sanjay Bangar.

What it means: He's going to annoy the bowlers all afternoon and score 12 runs.

'He mixes it up nicely'

Used for: Venkatesh Prasad, whose angry comeback ball after getting hit for a six was — you guessed right — a loopy leg-cutter.

What it means: He can't bowl a fast ball even if his life depended on it.

'… in fact …'

Used for: Covering up an on-air gaffe. Example: "That's gone for a six! In fact... he's bowled!"

What it means: God, how could I be so blind? Let me just correct myself with a clever turn of phrase and pretend nobody noticed.

'He has huge powers of concentration'

Used for: A batsman who has batted an unusually long period of time.

What it means: He's going to block bowlers all day without hitting a four.

'He's a utility player'

Used for: Cricketers who specialise in multiple disciplines.

What it means: He can't bowl, can't bat, can't field. Can carry the drinks out in less than 30 seconds.

(Co-authored by Arvind Iyer, a Bangalore-based film-maker and cricket fan)

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