'He’s no mug with the bat.'
Used for: Just about every No. 8 batsman in history.
What it means: I’m just being polite. He has little chance of scoring runs today.
'He's a gritty customer'
Used for: Sanjay Bangar.
What it means: He's going to annoy the bowlers all afternoon and score 12 runs.
'He mixes it up nicely'
Used for: Venkatesh Prasad, whose angry comeback ball after getting hit for a six was — you guessed right — a loopy leg-cutter.
What it means: He can't bowl a fast ball even if his life depended on it.
'… in fact …'
Used for: Covering up an on-air gaffe. Example: "That's gone for a six! In fact... he's bowled!"
What it means: God, how could I be so blind? Let me just correct myself with a clever turn of phrase and pretend nobody noticed.
'He has huge powers of concentration'
Used for: A batsman who has batted an unusually long period of time.
What it means: He's going to block bowlers all day without hitting a four.
'He's a utility player'
Used for: Cricketers who specialise in multiple disciplines.
What it means: He can't bowl, can't bat, can't field. Can carry the drinks out in less than 30 seconds.
(Co-authored by Arvind Iyer, a Bangalore-based film-maker and cricket fan)